is it okay if I’m just here to work?

an amygdala
3 min readMar 24, 2024
Photo by Rachel Moenning on Unsplash

Recently, I received the feedback that I’m not relational enough in a professional setting. This feedback seems to be entirely driven by observations made about me when I’m in weekly team meetings.

Let me back up a bit. There are these weekly 90 minute meetings where the larger team comes together and checks in. Now, out of those 90 minutes, about 5–7 minutes include updates that are tangentially related to my work, and this same information is presented in multiple smaller meetings as well.

What I’m saying is, my presence in those larger meetings is not needed.

Most of this team meeting is a socializing event. I lead a very different life than most of my colleagues. I don’t have much to add, and so I don’t. Why manufacture a connection?

The meeting also happens during the middle of my week, when there’s a ton of work on my plate. It’s not a good time for me to have to hear about people’s weekends. How I see it is: do you care more that I know about all your fun activities this weekend, person I barely know, or that I empower you with the work tools you have asked for?

I’m not going to stare at people who are talking about things that aren’t relevant to me. So, I do the other necessary work that needs to get done, but I’m listening with one ear. If something comes up that…



an amygdala

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