Maybe I should have mentioned in the post that I’m a born and raised Texan. I think that might have helped clarify my position: I get the angle of “politeness”, having grown up with it. The fact that men have used this terminology to sexualize me has absolutely made me even more averse to gendered terms. That said, we as people should revisit the language we use, even in the form of “social grease” (a term I really like, btw-thanks for sharing). It’s important for each of us to become more socially conscious of how we speak, myself included.