The Secret to Relationship Longevity

an amygdala
3 min readMay 14, 2023
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How many times have we heard phrases like, “Oh, you’ve changed on me” or “You’re not the person I met”?

Well, the truth of the matter is, it’s completely normal and reasonable for people to change. The hope is that people will grow into better versions of themselves. That they’ll bring more knowledge to the relationship and share it with their loved ones.

But, if a relationship is banking on both people staying the same, that’s not a healthy soil for longevity.

Relationships exist to foster personal growth. The best kinds of relationships are those in which both people reciprocate support. The right people for us help us achieve our desired outcomes. They help us change in the ways we want.

If you find yourself feeling like you must stay the same for a relationship to survive, stagnation’s going to begin creeping up pretty fast.

We’ve been together for over three years, and it feels like she isn’t growing as a person. It feels like she isn’t ready to be an adult and start doing adult things on her own and it bugs me. I’m not sure how I am supposed to feel because I want her to grow on her terms, but we are coming to a very pivotal moment in our relationship, and I feel she will never want to achieve the personal growth.

-Anonymous on Reddit



an amygdala

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